Whether you’re catching a game at the bar or watching from the couch at a party: here’s a fun look at five things not to do. Who says there’s no such thing as “spectator etiquette?”
#1 SMACK RUNNETH OVER
The great thing about sporting events is the rivalies between teams and fans alike. Stats are good. Playful ribbing is good. Even a bit of far-fetched smack talk is good. Much like drinking beer, know your limit. You’ll risk making a quiet, embarrassing exit if your team doesn’t pull through a victory.
#2 SPORTY SPICE NOT POSH
Be true to yourself, but loose the high maintenance gear. It can give a the false impression that you’re not there to have fun and enjoy the game, you’re merely there to be seen.
#3 DID YOU DOUBLE-DIP?
If we’ve only learned one thing from George Kostanza it is this: NEVER DOUBLE-DIP A CHIP. It’s a good way to spread germs to strangers. It will start a chain reaction of murmurs around the party, sideways glares, and other retribution from party guests.
#4 LIGHT AS A ROCK
Pondering the meaning of life is an ongoing exploration which uncovers more questions than answers. Keep your conversation light so you can enjoy the game.
#5 SMELL YA LATER
Those socks got your team through every game this season. You never wear deodorant when you team makes it to the playoffs. It’s your lucky jersey: you can’t wash it because the luck will rinse away. Many fans have superstitious habits, but if yours offends any of the 5 senses, limit your team spirit to a solitary viewing experience. Better yet – find a group of equally funky fans to flock with. Birds of a feather will appreciate your hygiene sacrifices.